Photography by Paolo Raeli
when you come over to my house two hours before I’m about to see the boy I like to do my makeup, this is when I know I love you. I can just look at you, and you already know what I’m about to say. I send you email essays and you read them, your replies riddled with sarcasm and support that doesn’t go unnoticed.
we have spa days with face masks and chocolate chip cookies. our hair up in messy buns, crying over lost love. cheesy rom coms, dance parties, throwback playlists. sending each other sappy poetry and planning outfits together. we lay on my driveway watching the stars, sharing stories that never leave the night. ratty t-shirts and dirty converse and uncontrollable laughter. a familiarity that feels like a big winter blanket, like home. we have hour long conversations about our hopelessly idealistic dreams: classy dinner parties in our adulthood, penthouse apartments with big vegetable gardens, a love that makes our heart dance the night away. joking about how we are in a three way friendship with the universe. talking boys, politics and art. overly excited texts, stupid ideas, a craziness that makes even me shake my head. we understand each other on a level that feels wild, a bond forged from secrets shared and clothes borrowed. we spend hours on the phone gossiping, catching up on all the lost details. we take each other on movie dates where we sneak in barbeque chips. we groan at the other person’s rants. we overshare.
when I send a text at 6AM and you reply, this is when I know I love you. you tolerate my picky eating and off-key singing. you are my tub of ice cream when heartbreak strikes. there is a sea of idiosyncrasies on my palm, but you hold my hand even when I make us go to vegan restaurants. we are dance partners and sun sisters and soul searchers. we are the red lipstick that makes us feel powerful. we are sweet honey. we are moonstruck madness. we are the whole, booming world: cities, mountains, and civilizations. we are loud and giddy and unstoppable, and we are not sorry about it.
when you tell me I am beautiful, this is when I know I love you. this is when I believe you.